“I know.” Over two months of my life revolved around someone I had refused to acknowledge existed, know, or even love. Reality hit me just a few days into summer break. “Luke, your dad crashed his motorcycle, and he might not make it out of this.” I have to admit, I did not care. I had not cared about him at all in the last 3 years or more. I never went to see him in the hospital. I didn’t think much about it, even when he started to get better. he had multiple skin-grafts, he was missing muscle, skin, and bones from his arms and legs, he was now a cripple, but he was O.K. For weeks, whenever he contacted me, I was selfish. I never showed him I was happy that he was better. We never engaged in real conversation, just an “I love you” here and there. One day, everything was as it had been for a few weeks. A calm, after a storm of sadness and uncertainty. My dad was O.K, (or so I had known up until this point…) and I had just got out of school. It was the third day of school, everything had been normal, and when the day ended, I walked out to my moms car to share how good of a time I was having. She was crying. I thought it was probably finances, or one of her fits...I was wrong. “Luke, something happened to your dad last night. We think he had a heart attack… ...he’s gone.” I know what it is like to regret being mean to someone. I know what it’s like to lose your father.
Over two months of my life revolved around someone I had refused to acknowledge existed, know, or even love.
Reality hit me just a few days into summer break.
“Luke, your dad crashed his motorcycle, and he might not make it out of this.”
I have to admit, I did not care. I had not cared about him at all in the last 3 years or more. I never went to see him in the hospital.
I didn’t think much about it, even when he started to get better. he had multiple skin-grafts, he was missing muscle, skin, and bones from his arms and legs, he was now a cripple, but he was O.K. For weeks, whenever he contacted me, I was selfish. I never showed him I was happy that he was better. We never engaged in real conversation, just an “I love you” here and there.
One day, everything was as it had been for a few weeks. A calm, after a storm of sadness and uncertainty. My dad was O.K, (or so I had known up until this point…) and I had just got out of school. It was the third day of school, everything had been normal, and when the day ended, I walked out to my moms car to share how good of a time I was having.
She was crying.
I thought it was probably finances, or one of her fits...I was wrong.
“Luke, something happened to your dad last night. We think he had a heart attack…
...he’s gone.”
I know what it is like to regret being mean to someone.
I know what it’s like to lose your father.